Learning to Manage Feelings

Children’s feelings and emotions can sometimes be intense. They can be quickly taken over by feelings of excitement, fear, frustration or joy. When feelings take over a child’s behaviour- it can be difficult for them to manage, without help from an adult. It is important for adults and caregivers to be able to recognize these emotions and feelings and label them! Understanding that having all emotions is acceptable, but teaching our children ways to cope with these feelings and emotions is crucial to their development.

How Parents Can help Children Manage Feelings

1. Notice Feelings

Before we can learn how to control feelings, we first have to notice them. You can help your child by noticing and paying attention to the ways they are feeling throughout the day and by giving them names- happy, angry, excited, frustrated.

     2. Talk About Everyday Feelings

Talking with your child about what it feels like when you are angry, sad, scared, nervous etc...will help them find ways to express their feelings without them having to act out through negative behaviours.

3. Create a Space for Talking About Difficult Feelings

Help children separate a feeling from a difficult reaction by helping them name it. Being able to say or think, “I am feeling angry”, means that children don’t have to act really angry before anyone notices. They can then choose how they will respond, perhaps by using one of the tools appropriate to get them out of that zone.

Things To Try At Home

• Use feeling words when you talk with your children about everyday situations: “You scored a goal! How exciting was that!” or “It must be pretty disappointing that you can’t play with Sarah today.”
• Invite children to describe their own feelings: “I’m feeling pretty nervous about going to the dentist. How about you?”